Wednesday, January 22, 2014

the i is a work in progress

tulips in decay

When I notice that someone has read one of my really old blogposts (it has after all been nearly 8,5 years since the first one now) I tend to shudder uncomfortably. Because when I go back and read those really really old posts I have to admit I find them to be a bit flimsy, shallow and strained. I also have to admit I sometimes toy with the idea of deleting them. Because they are not very representative of the I I am today.

But then I also like the fact that I have been consistent in blogging for such a long time. And that it's visible in words that I have changed and grown as a human being over these years. Progress and inner growth, isn't that what we all strive for? Or at least it should be. We should all want to become better versions of ourselves as planet beings, constantly. A work in progress.

So I let those old blog posts be, because they represent me all those years ago. Even if I'm not very proud of some of the things I wrote back then they are good as a reminder of development. That I'm not the person I was then, I'm not the person I was last year, hey not even the one I was last month actually. Things happen that reshape me all the time. And you too. All of us.

A reminder that it's good to look forward, move on, strive to be that better I-version, but one shouldn't and can't erase the past and what experiences, meets, people, thought have shaped the I today.

Thus even if I admittedly shudder over the notion that people still find and read those old posts I now feel a tad ashamed of (yes really), I let them be. Because they are a part of my life. A part of who I am today. And that has to be alright. Somehow.

2 comments:

Sienna Smythe said...

You should be proud of how your life has progressed. We all have to look toward the future. It is the here and now that is most important. The Albert Einstein quote: "Learn from yesterday,live for today. Hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning."

Poppy Q said...

I understand. I found my old diary from 25 years ago. Amazing to read, but glad that no one is there to share it. Still it is great to have that record. We have loved reading your stories Miss Pia.

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