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Saturday, March 03, 2018
dreams are
Was woken up last night at 4.55 - yes really - by a very intense, emotional dream. Which rarely happens, I can probably count the times on the fingers of one hand. But this was a kind of aha-moment that made me cry. Which also made me think about the saying that "Dreams are the answers of tomorrow's questions." Let's just say I really do hope this one was.
:: I've had a new routine since a year or so, every full moon (weather permitted) I have a little private ritual (which suddenly isn't quite as private, sharing this here) under it. Of giving thanks for things I'm grateful for and wishing for things important. Plus hopefully absorbing some positive energy from that bright, yellow bulb in the sky.
When doing this on March 1, which was absolutely freezing amidst all the snow and nothing remotely like dancing under a summer starlit sky, I suddenly heard an insisting meow. I thought it was one of my furries who were annoyed I wouldn't let them out in the garden, but it turned out it was the not-my-cat - which I will tell you about in another post, but in short, she's been sauntering the garden for many years when my cats aren't out, inspecting the premises from a safe distance up on the garden shed when I'm home and finally this summer she decided it was her home away from home too apparently. Ie playing queen of cats, eating, insisting to come inside, cuddles and chats. She's obviously well cared for and smells of some nice after shave, but I have no idea where she lives. - making a surprise visit late at night. I always talk out load to the moon and she had apparently heard me, how about that for cute serendipity?
:: The half February/half March has week has been a pretty good one. First the dishes in the organic, vegan food box have been a string of green, sparkling pearls this week. See, it's usually one or two dishes that shine and a couple that are nice, but not really memorable. But this week, oh my, so delicious all of them. Food post coming soon.
:: Then I offered a solution, or leastway a new start, for the hurtful ex-project mess. At least I have then done everything I can possibly do, and still acknowledging the hurt and let down. Life is short and this was something I really have enjoyed and had high hopes for. The least thing I can do, without losing my pride, is to say, let's talk about the future.
Which resulted in a really positive phone call from one of my ex-team guys at least. And I liked the "please don't lose hope of this" - and I won't, when I remember the first meeting and how natural the collaboration felt, I still believe in it. It was just the first project that went so much more crazy awry than I suppose anyone of us could have expected. So everything is just on pause now.
And quite possibly the team constellation will never be what it was. If the complete silence and unwillingness to talk things through from one person is anything to go by. But I have to be okey with that. What was meaningful to me might not have been as meaningful to others. And I suppose there's sooner or later exception to the rule of being a good judge of character. So I settle for being grateful for the joy that was, and the overall important life as well as work lesson this project has been.
:: A friend who reads this blog recently said 'I'm impressed that you're writing so open-heartedly about things.' - and I was 'You think it's free-spoken?' 'Duh'. I know I've touched on this before, that I don't feel I can write quite as openly as I once did. But I guess I still do, even if I obviously leave out a lot of matters. I just think authenticity is important. I'm sure some people can identify themselves in what I write, whilst others can't. If they even read this, that is, and what they make of it, who knows.
:: Quite a few positive, unexpected work related things appeared by the end of the week. Will hopefully know more next week. On a year when I've decided to be more brave I've decided to be more open for jobs I hadn't really contemplated before too. Still waiting for the Chief Happiness Officer offer though...
:: I've taken my second pair of glasses for some rides during the week. I think I prefer the green hornrimmed ones, but pink are always great too. Slightly smaller glass than the green ones since I hope I'll be able to get some sunglass clip-ons for them later on. Two for the price of one.
:: The fact that 90% of Swedes seem to dress in drab, depressing black, especially during autumn and winter - in a country that's in desperate need of light, inspiration and cheerful things half of the year - is just awful. The more I see all these dull people afraid of anything colourful, the more I'm adamant to go the other way. Or, well, continue to dress the way I've always done I suppose. I've just decided, even though I hate posting selfies and outfits in general, to actually do it more regularly on Instagram to inspire all those belonging to the 90% to try wear more colours. It does wonder for the mood, plus make other people happy too.
Some of the outfits to inspire might find their way to this blog too, who knows. It will be a great way for me to thrift in my own wardrobe, to mix and match new/old pieces. It'll be fun.
:: Ended the week with having a really lovely vegan brunch with a friend. I've been wanting to try that full English vegan for some time now. I've enjoyed so many of them over the years on our Britain and Scotland travels, but I still rarely cook them at home for lunch or dinner (bit too much for breakfast for a Swede who enjoys her tea and sandwich or soygurth with muesli, you know). The Stockholm hipster version of it was delicious. Teamed up with a turmeric latte, that happened to match my outfit. Like one does, now and then. And you can't have too much turmeric in your life.
Will now continue to spend my caturday, weekend, as it's best spent in freezing temperatures like this. And hope and wish for March to continue to show it's benevolent side. And the question to what a dream has already answered.
Quite right about dressing to inspire others, Pia! Whenever I spot a lady (or gentleman!) who has obviously made an effort in dressing for the trip to the supermarket, I offer a quiet compliment. "Thank you for wearing that lovely scarf -- it looks delicious!" seems fair reciprocation for a gesture that lifts my spirits.
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