So glad May is over. It really hasn't been a good month. From the unseasonal heatwave of global warming, to infuriating work related disappointment (that forever have chipped my trust in people and collaborations), worry, stress, lack of sleep and to top it off - this.
Poor little bunny Ztina. One of the irreplacable Prosit sisters. A few days ago I noticed her heavy breathing. I had hoped it was only the heat, it's taking its toll on us all, especially the furballs. But I knew it wasn't, she just wasn't her annoyingly, delightful self. Took her to the vet. Where it was discovered she apparently has a serious heart condition.
She was so brave and sweet all through the extensive examination, the ultrasound, the blood tests, the scary drainage of the fluid in her pericardium and pleura. The condition should be treatable and she's currently on three different meds, of which at least one, the heart medicine, will be for the rest of her (long!) life. Oh the joy.
Back for a check-up next week. She's almost her old self again, so fingers crossed the meds are working and that it'll be a viable long term solution.
Just when I really really really didn't need any more extra costs this happened, like when this emergency happened to her sister back in 2016. Luckily she has insurance, but still, the deductable is costly in itself.
For now I'm just so relieved she seems to be doing well. And I'm so blessed to have a oxytocin lifting personality like her in my life. Alongside her little furry family, who normally aren't this friendly with eachother but they seemed to get that circumstances where special after the vet visit yesterday.
Bye May, your may have been beautiful on the surface but I'm so sad you were such a generally disappointing, dispiriting, deplorable month in truth. Though I loved your lilacs. (And I will elaborate on your other adversities at a later date.)
Hello June, can you please, please, please be generously kind and uplifting?
And do offer some gorgeous, much needed rain?
Amidst sorrow blogging was tremendously therapeutical. In a chaotic project - with a client obviously many vegan sausages short of a full English breakfast and ill-equipped to lead a company - blogging was a must to sort out the bizarre, erratic behaviours.
This past couple of weeks with even more unsavoury behaviours, irrelevant ideas, a complete lack of acknowledging responsability, offering plausible explanations and solutions et al have been an exhausting source of even more blog topics of various kinds.
Or that the immense beauty in nature all May also is a very obvious reminder that global warming is real? Everything, and I mean everything, is in bloom now. Flowers and trees that should bloom one after the other between May and August, if nature wasn't having a breakdown caused my human behaviour, is now simultaneously blossoming.
Dandelions, lilacs, lilies of the valley, honeysuckle, rhododendron, peony, fritillaria, roses, apple blossoms... The beginning of the end? High summer temperatures and no rain. Weltschmerz is also real.
What I think about the fact that some companies still use personality tests in their recruitment processes that are completely irrelevant for the job in question? It's simply outdated, bizarre and not least unprofessional. And would I really want to work for an organization that use obsolete methods like that?
That this is not my cat-cats that have been sweet and friendly for years suddenly act crazy and can cause a lot of pain with an unprovoked big bite? I should probably be grateful that I'm still alive. And I admit to for the first time ever having encountered a cat whom I'm actually afraid of, from here on.
Or that when nicecream is free every kid in Stockholm claim they are vegan hipsters (and are a bit full of themselves)? Especially the salted caramel hazelnut was nice, but not nearly as fantastic as Ben & Jerry's vegan icecream.
That you can actually get pretty decent results when you cut your own hair with guidance from YouTube tutorials? I cut over 20 cm. And funny enough I don't really miss the lost wisps, this time.
Or that Haevn's first album is released tomorrow May 25? That every song they've slowly released all through April and May have been lovely. But my favourites so far are "Back in the water" and this one "Love is a game". The phrase "I will be on my weakest when you hold on" is beautiful. And I like that it's dance music. Ie perfect for star dancing.
That the discovery that new TV-show "The good fight" is a spin-off from one of my favourite series "The good wife" makes me very happy. Always love a great story, a clever dialogue. In legal setting.
That there is a special, very warm place for recruiters and HR-people that don't realise the only decent way to behave (and not least an important part of their job!) towards every interviewee that don't get the job is to call or send a personal email, tell them why and thank them for their precious time and interest?
Or that I'm so incredibly tired of stupid, ignorant people (that don't live in a cave or are illiterate) that A) Don't acknowledge that it's their behaviour that causes global warming. That everything is connected, what you chose to do on this side of the planet, the food you eat, the clothes you wear, the transport, the holidays affect what happens on the other side of the planet?
That B) always blame other animals than humans for the environmental issues. And per usual think killing animals is the solution to sort problems caused by humans. Own your responsability, idiots. The butterfly effect is real. And a huge reason for the world being what it is, is people refusing to take responsability for their actions or non-actions.
Well, where to start? Let's see this post as a foretaste, and I'll elaborate another day.
When I'm not in swoon over the bliss and beauty of lilacs.
I had a dreaded meeting with my accountant the other day. It was cathartic to tell the story, in short, to someone who has a very pragmatic, yet understanding, view of the situation. There might have been some tears of relief and gratitude. And a fighting spirit awakening again. She said what I needed to hear. What I must do next.
My flaws in this nasty project case were I was passionate, hardworking and trusting. And since those features of mine also are some I'm really proud to possess I will just own it. I don't trust easily in general, but after working through the grief recovery process last summer I felt so relieved, restored, empowered and psyched to get going with new things.
And the first meeting was so good. And when our first project started I was just thrown in head first with gusto. Since it was our first time working together as a team, remote team, it was bound to be a few kinks. I was open and willing to learn, share, without losing my own voice of reason. And when the client begun acting more and more weird, I was still so happy about my kind team. Of course they were on top of things, the background and matters I didn't know about. Simply trust.
A bitter pill to swallow. A costly life lesson, on various levels. Another fight to fight. Even if things happen for a reason, as always. Though amidst it and its serious ramifications it is difficult to see the silverlining of new, yet unknown doors that open instead.
When you then are forced to struggle to sort things out, both short and long term, when you also blame yourself for being a trusting fool - then it's sweet to get some pragmatic advice and help from someone not involved. Little bright lights to guide me. And in this case, a practical lesson from my accountant.
There are times to be kind, caring, waiting, trusting the process and so forth. There are other times when you just have to look after yourself and your own needs, when noone else does or obviously even care. For anyone but themselves.
I felt lighter after the meeting, more focused. And hadn't it been for the coffee in shape of my beloved soy latte I would even have slept great. It was a long long time since I slept great. I do miss having invigorating sleeps.
What is most always invigorating is to vegan cook as well as eat though. And this weekend I made falafel from scratch again. Practice makes perfect, because this time I tweaked it a bit and cooked it another way. 33 delightful little falafel balls came out of that. Served with fried aubergine, onion, ruccola (which I'm not a fan of but it was included in the food box recipe), diced tomatoes and a simple sauce of Oatly iFraiche with lemon. It was delicious and very satisfying.
Cooking and thinking about how to present a meal in pictures is really therapeutic too. You empty the brain, dance in the kitchen - even if under the stars is an option again too - and focus. I'm so happy about my little gig. A really sweet thing that also happened for a reason. And sharing is caring, especially on a Caturday.
So pretty month of May,
half of your time is almost up,
can we make a deal, how about
being really really awesome
these last couple of weeks?
I would be ever so very very grateful.
Hell hath no fury like a woman not being paid by her client. And as new unsavoury details unfold in the ex-project mess I'm really gobsmacked that they think the people affected by this appalling, careless and selfish behaviour will just accept and be quiet. Which is obviously sheer stupidity on their part.
Not only have I not been fully paid, this project has also put my own business in danger. Due to the fact I have lost other revenues since I said no to other job offers as I (was a fool to) believe in it as a long term prospect. And the whole thing has been time consuming, energy draining and obviously really hurtful. At a time in my life when I really really didn't want to fight any new battles.
And that's only my story in very short. I'm not the only one hurt. It has been an important life lesson. But with ramifications I did in no way expect, just because I trusted people to be decent, fair, truthful and not despicable ass hats.
Of course I'm not going to be quiet and accepting about this. Doing that would eat me up from inside. They have certainly messed with the wrong person. Currently collecting facts and pondering the best way for maximum impact.
So while I entertain different scenarios in this aspect, my brain is still capable of work, entertain and enjoy other things. Like long walks and seasonal inauguration of the Moomin sneakers - which sadly gave me serious blisters this year so I won't be stepping into them anytime soon, buhu - and the brilliant weather. Global warming gave us high summer weather in early May, I know, and it's with very mixed feelings of human guilt I enjoy it. Weltschmerz is always lurking at the back of my mind.
I baked vegan scones and had a little brilliant cream tea brunch to celebrate the arrival of May. To be able to enjoy so many meals al fresco as I've done so far in May is bliss. And I'm certainly not alone. My ever present masters of mindfullness and life enjoyment make the most of every day in the garden.
I May have got myself a very Moominesque Marimekko dress. I feel like a life size Little My (obviously my spirit character) in a fabulous power dress in it. Classic design and it will last for years. Just like my beloved flowery happy coat. Statement pieces of great quality that lift the mood of both wearer and viewers are great. I also like the fact that the dress is both casual and party depending on accessories. And it has pockets. Which all the best dresses have.
On my way home that day I spotted something that looked like a Moomin stuffed toy discarded at the recycling station. It was. Serendipity. The Moomin dad naturally came home with me. He might be the start of the revival of the Teddybear Sanctuary.
In the shivering last days of April my Christmas (!) amaryllis finally came into gorgeous bloom. Those two flowers have since withered but I think my little eye spy a couple of new buds replacing them. Better late than never, only five months late.
Soon, very soon the lilacs will be in full bloom already. My hedge is brimming with buds. And fingers crossed I don't have the snivels this year, so I can enjoy the wonderful, enlivening scent. The hedge is situated right outside the bedroom and the scent of it seeping inside is one of the loveliest seasonal things.
The top loveliest seasonal thing though arrived here today, the first summer hedgehog. Contemplating mowing the lawn when I noticed movement in the shrubs and some cute little sneezes, sure enough a wee hedgehog sighting. S/he was treated to some luxuary cat food and later feel asleep in an adorable little prickly bun shape in the flower bed. I feel blessed having such precious summer guests.
Once upon a time I had a slight case of addiction fondness for expensive, posh handbags (Mulberry). Back then I didn't have as much trouble justifying buying leather products as I have now. And back then my finances were quite different. As were my shopping habits in general. I'll even admit to feeling pretty embarassed reading old blogposts like this about expensive, leather handbags.
But that was I then, today's I is quite different. What a difference some years make. I'm glad we evolve as human beings, at least on a personal level - as a specie I'm very much not sure.
I've never been a backpack person, it's just not my style. Plus I think it's a drawback to always having to take it off to reach for your belongings. Handbags are much more convenient. That said, I did get my first classic, Swedish KÃ¥nken backpack in 2012. For work, and with room enough for laptop.
I haven't carried the laptop around much in it, but it has been great for travelling. My issue with it though, is that my swayback - which is rather prominent - doesn't approve of heavy backpacks and I often end up with an aching back as well as shoulders.
I know you can buy attachments, strap them around your waist and they'll ease the backpack burden. But I haven't been using it quite as much to justify that.
Still, I have been toying with the idea of getting a more Pia appropriate colourful, regular size KÃ¥nken for years. And when I heard about a new, special edition called Re-KÃ¥nken last year I went and had a look. And fell in colour love. Plus I think it's amazing that the whole backpack is made of one single thread made from 11 plastic PET bottles. Coloured in the Spin dyed-tecchnique, which reduces the environmental impact.
Learn more about it in this video from Fjällräven.
The basic boring colours aside the Re-kånken offers much deeper, brighter colours than the other Kånken backpacks, which also fade in colours over the years. And there's no risk of them bleeding colours on light clothes.
I ended up chosing from the three different colours above, mainly between pink and that gorgeous teal, turquoise called Emerald. When I had a little guessing game on Instagram on which one I chose it was pretty much unanimous that the blue one screamed Pia. And yes, it did. I adore the pink one, but it's trickier to match all year round, for someone who wears as much colours as I. It would be a lovely summer backpack though.
I'm still surprised how quickly I did adapt to being a backpack person. And how fun it has been (especially during the summer months) to unintentionally match it with outfits.
My swayback vs backpack is still bugging me, so I have to be careful not filling it too heavy. And I've noticed that my left thumb grasp is a bit sore by all the hoisting the backpack up on my back. As it isn't conventient to carry the travelcard or iPhone in the backpack you have to carry that in other ways. You just have get new routines for it. For security reasons I have a padlock on it at all times, pick pockets unwelcome.
I've basically worn it every day, I'm out and about, ever since I got it. Come rain come shine. Come work come play. I've managed to stain it with lipstick (the lid came off in the front pocket), but I think it was reasonably easy to clean with soap and water.
As it is re-made from plastic/polyester the surface has become a bit rugged. Which isn't ideal, but I suppose is a price you pay for the material and the awesomeness of how its made. And it's not visible unless you look really close. Also, do note that it's very susceptible to cat hair. In other words, keep it out of reach from felines.
A funny, unexpected detail of these past 10 months since I got it, is that during the first few months alone I got more compliments from friends and strangers alike on how lovely it looks and how amazing the colour is, than I've gotten for all those years over the expensive, posh, leather handbags. Go figure. Dare to compliment.
Now a little colourful Re-KÃ¥nken, shoe per diem, outfit cavalcade over our time together.
Here's to many years of adventures together! And first another, full summer of fun!
What better way to start the glorious month of May than with an irresistable, easy to make, delicious dessert? Here's finally the adapted recipe of that lovely plantbased Snickers dessert I made during Easter. Chocolate, peanuts and crunchy biscuits all the way, baby! It's served with chocolate sauce and obviously I think you should make your own, from this delicious easy peasy recipe.
Snickers dessert 6 servings
50 g dark chocolate (coarsely chopped)
2 tbsp oat milk
2 tbsp cacao
0,5 dl crunchy peanut butter
0,5 dl light syrup
flaked salt
2 dl Alpro soy cream (I'm sure you can use oat cream or coconut cream too)8st digestive biscuits (without palm oil, I use Ica's own) chocolate sauce
2-4 tbsp chopped peanuts
1. Blend chocolate, oat milk, cacao, peanut butter, syrup and salt in a pot. Stir and melt on low heat until smooth and shiny cream. Let it cool somewhat. 2. Whip the soy cream until fluffy and firm. 3. Slowly add the chocolate cream into the whipped cream and blend properly into a mousse. 4. Crush the digestive biscuits a bit and dispense in 6 glasses or small bowls. 5. Ladle the Snickers mousse over the crushed biscuits. Pour chocolate sauce on top and then som chopped peanuts.
Enjoy! NB Beware of snoopervisors who love the mousse too.
