You know what, today was the first day in about ten months that I woke up in the morning (late morning) feeling I had had eigth-ish hours of interrupted sleep and had the energy to actually feel inclined to do things without forcing myself to do them just because I should.
I had forgotten how life could/should feel. And how miserable is that?
I cooked, I took photos, ate some and then I took a long walk with little mum in our current winter wonderland. There were actually un-forced spring in my steps. Again, 10 months lost.
Since we went past the local church and I’d never been inside and it happened to be open, we stepped in and sat in the warmth for a while. I’m an atheist of course, but I can enjoy quietly contemplating in my own bubble in churches. However the organist was playing rather unpleasant music so there wasn’t any quiet time available alas.
But I always like to light candles and remember beings lost and missed. And for things I wish to change.
No line thrown my way, yet, alas. But for now I’m grateful for a beautiful day with energy and without brain fog. And the fact that I’ve planned and put together a third Vegoforum (theme being Vego and animal rights in media this time) to be held on February 13th (two talks will be in English, speakers from The Vegan Society and Sentient Media, three in Swedish and then we’ll have a panel in Swedish). It’ll be held on Zoom and it’s free, but you need to book a spot for it. Or watch in on YouTube after. Where you also find last year's digital forums.
And with that I’ve tied together the tasks there wasn’t time to complete on my gig last autumn. It feels great to finally tick that box. The project has been fun, frustrating, exhausting, infuriating, inspiring and I've learnt oodles. Now I need to rest from that, and let someone else take the rein again. I must focus on finding my purpose, my people, my job. Simple (and difficult apparently) as that.
As this is quite an urgent situation now I also work a lot on my ability to really trust that the Universe has my back and attracting my goals. I think I've been very clear with what I want (ehat I really really want) for years now. But still it has been illusive and evasive. Come on 2021, I need your help!
Apart from continuing on my purpose finding quest, I’m planning to read more books now again. I’ve only finished three (of my 52 books goal of 2021), so I want to step that process up.
Next week I’ll be able to pick up vegan buns at my local bakery and assemble my own semla at home. Was afraid there wouldn’t be any semla at all this year, but I’m so happy to report that I asked and they said yes. It’ll be fun to make my own almond paste again. If I had a kitchen aid I'd bake my own vegan semla buns, but that's not an option now.
I hope this good day will not be a rare exception to the previous brain fog months. But for now I’m ever so grateful for one truly happy day. Let’s keep this post light and short for a change. Life’s rough enough in these times.
In the next posts I’d like to write about Two Fluffy Tykes art, baking vegan cakes and the miracle of aquafaba, more organic vegan food inspiration, philosophy, sheep, good books and the not so happy current things like my indoor heating that leaves a lot to be desired. Oh how I’m looking forward to the day I’m able to sort that out properly...
February, welcome, be kind and inspiring, and very helpful pretty please.
2 comments:
Pia i struggled to read books last year too and I think 52 was my number too, and much less than previous years. Maybe it is our age ?
You must be looking forward to spring. I never want summer to end.
Julie and poppyq
Xxx
Well since I’ve struggled with my reading capacity since I was burned out in the beginning of the 2000-ies I don’t believe it’s age-related but stress related. Given how utterly devastating my reading form has been for years I find around 50 books astonishing. Stress and life’s miseries take its toll no matter age, I’d say.
Oh spring will be lovely! It’s freezing now and it’s hard to grasp these temperatures were normal and easy to deal with once upon a time. THAT I can see as possibly age related, both cold and the extreme heat are hard to cope with these days.
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