Thursday, June 27, 2013

dare to compliment

heart knees

I'm a firm believer of giving compliments to people as often as possible, obviously only heartfelt ones and not just because one *should* or trying to flatter someone's ego for personal gain. Because giving and getting compliments is such a simple winwin situation which only costs a few words but boost someone's day and life. Happiness, however seemingly minor, rubs off.

Unexpected compliments from strangers or people you barely know is of course quite lovely, affirming and happiness instigating too. But a compliment from a friend who sees and knows the inner you, well that's sweetness on another level wouldn't you agree?

Today was a day when I got one of the sweetest compliments ever, from such a friend. Being in a happy place as I am right now I'm feeling relaxed and quite exuberant in a feelgood way whilst this friend didn't yesterday. We spent a good few hours talking and parted in good moods I think. She later texted me and said she felt much better today, that life once again felt full of promise and that my infectious joy of living had rubbed off. I was so touched, such a darling thing to say!

Wouldn't that be a lovely thing to be/do, make a living off, just being infectiously inspiring and joy instigating? There are so many people whose life paths cross with mine who I would so like to shake and say 'is this really the way you want your life to be until you retire??', they look and behave so jaded, unhappy, stressed, tired and wary. And many of them are great people with lots of competence, skills and qualities which could be used in so many better ways. If they could just take the time (which is a tricky thing when you're in the middle of chaos, I know) to do some soul searching and shift focus.

And that even if life isn't fair (because we all know that by now, right?) one can't keep blaming the surrounding circumstances and other people for the situation and life one's living, they won't care, they won't change, they don't hold a solution. And even if it's a cliché, well technically two clichés, the only one you can be sure of you can change is yourself, your attitude and 'be the change you want to see'.

As it happens, one of the projects I'm working on (with a partner) currently holds elements regarding compliments and joy. When autumn comes - after a couple of long, glorious summer months still! - it'll be ready to be revealed. Which I feel is both exciting and joy instigating. Giving happiness will lead to getting happiness, in one way or another.

Are you good at giving compliments?
To family, friends and strangers?
Are you good at recieving compliments

or do you still struggle to say thank you
and by that devalue the kind words?


Kea said...

I'll sometimes compliment a woman (stranger) on her hair or colour of piece of clothing, things like that. I don't compliment men I don't know, since they could misinterpret. Besides, I seldom see men who are especially well put together.

I have complimented female friends and co-workers on their upbeat attitudes, things I admire about them, etc.

However, I have a very difficult time, even in middle age, accepting compliments, because I don't believe I warrant them.

Elephant's Child said...

I am with Kea. I give compliments often, but don't accept them comfortably. Probably something which needs work.

pärlbesatt said...

I believe I'm good at giving them, although sometimes at the wrong places so people wonder about my (non-existing) agenda, but never mind... I think I'm ok at getting them too, if I think the thing said is adequate. If not I'll still be happy someone said something nice to me. And I love the hearts on your knees, did you draw them or are they tattooed?

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