random sunday reflections

Some recent snippets of thoughts in a random row;

~ A week from now I will be walking the streets of another capital in Europe. It's time for the very much treasured little birthday-getaway we've had since 2007. I'm not interested in getting regular gifts - since I can't say I need more stuff really... - but I love if we can find cheap tickets to a nice city for some exploring during a few days in october.

The best trip by far, so far, was the one to Gdansk in 2009. Loved that place. So I had hoped this year would bring some days of walking the autumnal streets of some eastern European city with beautiful  architecture, cultural ambiance (preferably without any real shopping temptations but many good cafés).

Yes, I had planned the packing, my mind was set. See, I had told M to keep the destination a secret until at the airport. That secret slipped yesterday - when talking about vegetarian restaurants, "this one is said to be the best in xxx"... oh dear - and even if this certainly is a city I've had on my want-to-visit-list it is not;

:: an eastern European one reaches with a couple of hours flight - I hate long flights if you desperately lack room to stretch legs properly 
:: an autumnal city as we now it in Scandinavia, in fact the temperatures are rather summery indeed and now I have to revise my packing - oh my
:: a place lacking of ample shopping temptations - need.to.save.money.
:: a place where there's a need for a red tassel cap

I know, know, know, all this is such a luxuary problem indeed, but I fear I am a tad disappointed about the lack of autumnal-eastern-european-street-walking a week from now... At the same time as I know it will be a fabulous trip - minus the long flight... - with ample photo opportunities (but probably a lack of easy and free/affordable Internet connection) and yes, a castle in the city.

Now, two important matters to ponder; which shoes to bring and which bobbaloos will be chosen for an abroad adventure...

Feel free to guess the city, from the clues above plus it's in Europe, in close proximity to water, it's the capital of a country I've been to twice before (but never to this city).

~ Got an email last week saying the Shakin' Stevens concert next Friday is cancelled (reason unknown). As disappointing as that in itself is, I have to say that I'm really most happy about getting my money back since I do need to put in quite an order at MOO this week. I hope he'll return to Sweden another time and that I'm able to get tickets then instead.

~ I've written about the recurring disappointment coming from the discussions with friends and acquaintances about starting up projects and businesses, that in the end just ends up in nothing. A lot more talk than action (which certainly is not something I need more of, the prior that is). But as disappointing as those matters are, just as relieved I am about others projects not becoming a reality.

The case being you have obviously misjudged people, since suddenly they show rather an appaling lack of perspective and more than a tad bit patronizing behaviour. I know, one will sadly never stop being surprised and sometimes appaled by human behaviour, but I confess, sometimes I really believe some people I meet are more caring, more knowledgeable about the surrounding world, more grown-up if you like. In those cases I'm simply dumstruck by their childish and petty behaviour, when it shows its ridiculous head. And then I'm grateful for another project simply having petered out into nothingness.

~ It's really well about time to do a bit of renovating and sprucing of the room that was meant to be my office space when I moved here - ten years ago come December! Yes it has bookshelves filled with books on important matters, an imposing desk - inherited from my father - but admittedly it has mostly been a room for dumping stuff I'm not sure what to do with at the moment (weeks, months, years...).

For a long time I've felt that the huge, imposing oak-tree desk with matching dark bookshelves have dampened my creativity, it's not a room I've enjoyed (even when clutter-free) spending time in, no matter light walls and a big window, those dark, heavy furnitures really aren't my cup of tea. I've just felt reluctant getting rid of the desk since it was after all my father's and I remember him spending a lot of time at it. But it really isn't what I want. And I would never ever contemplate getting such a desk myself - and the bookshelves I only bought dark to match the desk.

So time has come to say goodbye to my father's desk, I'm sure someone will have good use of it, it's a well-made, no fuss, heavy and imposing kind of desk. Myself I just want something airy and simple, a large white tabletop supported by trestles.

I'm also seriously thinking about painting the walls, the wallpaper works, but it's old and boring and it's really time I put some stamp of my own on the walls in this house. I've already decided on the colour, not I just have to find the perfect hue.

I've already three new bookshelves lined up to take the dark, drab ones place. If there's one thing I like about IKEA it's the Billy bookshelves. And these where of a limited edition, rather fabulous style at a reduced price. They have been patiently waiting for many months to be assembled.

Months ago I also got a lovely Emma-armchair from my favourite charity shop. It looked to be recently upholstered and was irresistable (as well as ridiculously cheap). That chair awaits its perfect place in my new office space too. It's a room off limits for cats (no space for hairs and claws) so the sweet velvet piece will have nothing to fear residing in there.

I then have all sorts of small painting and upcycling projects to get more creative and quirky storage space in that rather large room. Yes I'm rather excited about this (and a tad overwhelmed by the work getting there, or perhaps I'm just exaggerating the actual amount of work needed). When it's all finished I promise to show pictures (hopefully this time of New Year's).

~ Since this decision, I've felt more in balance than I think I've felt for a long long time. It has been a good few weeks, filled with both creativity and must-dos. I've spent them talking, talking, talking to people, emailing, writing, thinking, reading useful books (not the kind where you need a reading mojo), going to seminars and information meetings. I have some more things lined up for this week, then it's time for the little getaway with mindful relaxation, before one (ie me) has to really start working with the things I mean to do. In my own business. Finally.

As I've reached a place in my life where I have no other viable choices than to go ahead with this, there's no turning back and there's just no other outcome for this venture than success. It may of course not be a roaring such from day one, neither week nor month (touch wood), but it really has every chance to be given some time. I'm not talking financial success - even if I know what monthly income would make me happy, it's a goal and quite far from a millionaire's notion, being able to pay my bills, buy the not so odd pair of shoes, travel now and then and give more to worthy causes than I'm able to do today, then I'm well chuffed - but just the thought of being my own boss, having the overall controll and responsability of my work and days, doing what I do best, combining my creativity with my legal, formal background - I have to say, I am quite fond of my USP - that makes me so happy.

Here's to more balance in life and happiness in the week to come!